Published January 2023 on Spotfiy
778: Custody Depends on Testimony Against Old Friend | Feedback Friday
1. Introduction
Dr. Kevin shares surprising insights on psychopathy and how to turn yourself into a psychopath using magnets in this two-part episode.+
2. Crossdressing Confessions
Crossdressing Confessions:Gabriel and Jordan discuss a letter from a crossdresser who is struggling with keeping his secrets locked away. They offer insights on the importance of opening up and dealing with the underlying issues, rather than just focusing on the clothes.+
Crossdressing and Vulnerability:Jordan and Gabriel discuss a listener's update on their crossdressing journey and the vulnerability it takes to come out at 70-something years old. They also make a lighthearted reference to Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs.+
3. Tough Friendship Choices
Tough Friendship Choices:Gabriel seeks advice from Jordan on how to navigate a difficult situation with a friend who is going through a custody battle with her ex-husband. Gabriel is caught between wanting to remain neutral and supporting his friend, but also wanting to do what is right for the children involved.+
Custody Battle Conflict:Jordan and Gabriel discuss a letter from a listener who is struggling with a custody battle between two of their friends. They explore the conflict of wanting to help one friend while also honoring the terms of their friendship with the other. They also delve into the mental health and worldview of the friend who cut off the listener for not being fully on their side.+
Testifying for a Friend:Jordan and Gabriel discuss the dilemma of testifying against a friend in court. They weigh the importance of loyalty and confidentiality against the potential harm to the friend's ex and children. Ultimately, they conclude that the well-being of the children should take precedence and that testifying is the right thing to do.+
4. Sponsors
Fitness Goals:Jordan shares his tips on how to achieve your fitness goals and stick to your resolutions, including protecting your time and lowering the friction to make exercise a habit. He also recommends Peloton's rowing machine as a low-impact, full-body workout option.+
Rowing Form Correction:Jordan and Jen discuss Peloton Row's Form Assist feature, which tracks your movements and helps correct your form to prevent repetitive strain injuries. They also mention the option of going to a Peloton showroom to have a trainer help you improve your form.+
5. Dating with Chronic Illness
Dating with Chronic Illness:Jordan and Gabriel discuss the ethical implications of dating with a chronic illness. Jordan advises against hiding the illness, as it can be seen as manipulative, and suggests being upfront early on in the relationship.+
Dating with Chronic Illness:Gabriel and Jordan discuss the challenges of dating with a chronic illness. They explore the importance of being upfront about the condition and how owning it can make all the difference in how potential partners respond. They also touch on the anxiety that can come with revealing a chronic illness and the risks of delaying the conversation.+
Dating with Shame:Jordan and Gabriel discuss how shame can impact dating and provide advice on how to work through it. They suggest acknowledging and accepting one's condition and being open and honest with potential partners.+
6. Job Hunting and Transition
Job Hunting Strategies:Jordan advises Gabriel to stay put and go into aggressive job-hunting mode, as it's generally easier to find a job when you have a job. He also suggests that Gabriel should focus on building his skills and network in HR, and consider taking online courses or attending industry events to gain more knowledge and experience.+
Job Transition Advice:Jordan offers advice on whether to quit a job or stay and transition to a new one. He weighs the risks of leaving against the benefits of staying and offers tips for building relationships and skills to position oneself for a new job. He also suggests asking for a raise and investing in personal branding. Ultimately, the decision depends on the individual's mental health and tolerance for the current work environment.+
7. Sponsors
Jordan reflects on the pressure of finding one's purpose and shares his experience of not having a "capital P" purpose for a long time. He encourages listeners to focus on what they enjoy doing and milestones they are working towards instead of getting caught up in the idea of a grand purpose.+
8. Finding Purpose
Finding Purpose:Jordan discusses the pressure to find one's purpose and how it can lead to anxiety, fear, and insecurity. He explores the self-help industry's obsession with finding purpose and how it can be detrimental to our well-being.+
Rethinking Purpose:Jordan discusses the idea of the "cult of purpose" and how it can lead to imposter syndrome. He emphasizes that purpose is not something we decide, but rather something we discover and develop. Instead of trying to become an idea of ourselves, we should focus on stepping into who we already are.+
9. Sponsors
Jordan thanks listeners for their support of sponsors and encourages them to visit jordanharbinger.com/deals for exclusive discounts and codes.+
10. Processing Anger
Processing Anger:Gabriel shares his recent breakthrough in processing his trauma and how it has brought back anger into his emotional life. Jordan and Gabriel discuss the concept of internalizing blame and how to channel anger towards positive outcomes.+
Healthy Anger Management:Jordan and Gabriel discuss the importance of being in touch with your anger and how therapy can help manage it in a healthy way. They emphasize the need to express anger appropriately and acknowledge one's role in a situation.+
Channel Your Anger:Jordan and Gabriel discuss how to handle anger in a positive way by straddling it in another person's position and channeling it into something good. They suggest finding a specific and doable project to channel anxiety or anger into and using it to do something good.+
Channeling Anger:Gabriel and Jordan discuss how to channel anger into productive directions, such as openly talking about the problem, using anger to motivate change, exploring anger in therapy, or finding a new job. They also emphasize the importance of using anger to learn about oneself and build better relationships, rather than using it to dominate others.+
11. Neighbor Theft Solutions
Crazy Neighbor Theft:Gabriel seeks advice from Jordan about his neighbor who has been stealing his packages and belongings. Jordan provides insights on how to catch her in the act and put an end to the theft, despite her unstable behavior and criminal activities.+
Dangerous behavior:Jordan and Gabriel discuss the dangers of shooting guns into the air and stealing from neighbors, sharing personal stories and insights on the topic. They also touch on the responsibility of landlords in keeping their buildings safe.+
AirTag Strategy:Jordan shares his strategy for catching a mail thief using AirTags, tiny trackers that allow you to keep tabs on your belongings. He suggests buying a few cheap items, sticking AirTags inside them, and letting the thief steal them. By tracking the AirTags, you can catch the thief in real-time and have proof of their theft.+
Catching a Thief:Jordan suggests purchasing cameras to catch a thief in the act. By having footage of the thief stealing packages, it provides evidence to report the crime to the landlord and police.+
Dealing with a dangerous neighbor:Gabriel and Jordan discuss how to handle a dangerous neighbor who is stealing packages and has a gun. They suggest gathering evidence and presenting it to the police or landlord, but also express concern for the safety of the person involved.+
Dealing with a Troublesome Neighbor:Jordan and Gabriel discuss potential solutions to deal with a neighbor who has Borderline Personality Disorder and has been stealing packages. They weigh the risks of involving the police and suggest setting up cameras in common areas. They also consider confronting the neighbor with evidence of her actions.+
12. Outro
Jordan shares his tips on building a strong network and the importance of building relationships before you need them. He also promotes his free Six-Minute Networking course that teaches listeners how to dig the well before they get thirsty.+