Published November 2021 on Spotfiy
589: Persevering Past Paranoid Parental Persecution | Feedback Friday
1. Prioritizing Life Goals
Feedback Friday:Jordan and Gabriel provide practical advice and problem-solving strategies to help listeners live their richest life. They decode the stories, secrets, and skills of fascinating people and turn their wisdom into actionable insights.+
Prioritizing Life Goals:Jordan discusses the importance of reevaluating priorities in life, especially during the pandemic. He encourages listeners to make a list of their priorities and consider whether their actions align with those values.+
2. Coping with Toxic Parents
Dealing with Toxic Parents:Gabriel advises a listener who is dealing with toxic parents who refuse to respect boundaries. He suggests practical ways to protect herself and her family while acknowledging the difficulty of the situation.+
Dealing with Toxic Parents:Jordan and Dr. Erin Margolis discuss the normalcy of emotions that arise from abusive parents and the power of taking an active stance in protecting oneself and their family.+
Accepting Insanity:Jordan and Dr. Margolis discuss the importance of accepting the reality of intolerable family situations, rather than trying to change them. They explore the feelings that come up around the idea of being passive, and how viewing oneself that way can lead to feeling like a victim or vulnerable. Acceptance is an active and responsible choice.+
Paranoia and Inheritance:Gabriel and Dr. Margolis explore how paranoia can be inherited from parents and how it might be influencing the way the speaker is responding to their parents. They suggest exploring what was learned from the parents about not trusting other people and assuming bad things are going to happen.+
Dealing with Toxic Parents:Gabriel and Jordan discuss how therapy can help with managing thoughts and dealing with toxic parents. They also explore the privacy angle of the situation and suggest using take-down services to remove personally identifiable information from the web.+
3. Sponsors
Jordan Harbinger shares two important messages in this chapter. Firstly, he talks about the holiday sales and recommends Cuts Clothing for comfortable and stylish attire. Secondly, he emphasizes the importance of mental health maintenance and promotes Better Help online therapy.+
4. Moving On
Moving On:Gabriel seeks advice on how to navigate the dating world while separated from his wife, with whom he adopted three children and is in the process of adopting a foster child. He worries that potential partners will be put off by the open relationship arrangement he and his wife have agreed upon.+
Marriage and Parenting:Jordan speaks with a man who has been through extraordinary situations with his wife, including the loss of a child to suicide, the adoption of three children, and his wife coming out as gay. They discuss the challenges of shifting the terms of their marriage to suit their needs while keeping it intact for practical reasons, and the importance of considering what's best for their children in this non-traditional home.+
Coping with Extraordinary Grief:Jordan offers advice to a couple dealing with a lot of emotional baggage. He suggests that they seek family therapy and grief support groups to help them cope with their loss and stress. Additionally, he advises them to consider the impact of their dating lives on their family and to be practical about how much time they can devote to new relationships.+
Dating After Divorce:Gabriel advises being clear on your stories when dating after a divorce. He suggests being honest and upfront about your past and where you're at emotionally before jumping into a new relationship.+
Moving On:Gabriel advises on how to move on after a divorce, including being upfront and secure in your story, bearing the response you receive, and formally separating from your ex-partner. Jordan adds a humorous suggestion for the location of these conversations.+
Balancing Needs:Jordan and Gabriel discuss the challenges of balancing personal needs and the needs of others in relationships. They emphasize the importance of seeking therapy to work through difficult periods and prioritize self-care.+
5. Teaching Kids Languages
Jordan and Gabriel discuss the benefits of teaching kids a second language, with Mandarin being the most useful language to learn due to China's rise. Spanish is also a great option for those in the US or South America. Starting young is key, and online teachers make it easy and affordable.+
6. Overcoming Regret
Overcoming Regret:Jordan advises Gabriel to accept and forgive himself for his past and integrate it into his present. He reminds Gabriel that his past has led him to this moment of self-reflection and growth, and that is valuable.+
Investing in Relationships:Jordan emphasizes the importance of investing in meaningful relationships to improve overall happiness and heal from depression. He suggests developing close intimate relationships where individuals can be themselves and not hide aspects of who they are. Jordan also encourages actively working on meeting new people and deepening existing relationships with family and friends.+
Finding Your Purpose:Jordan shares insights on how to find your purpose, emphasizing the importance of doing something you care about, investing in yourself, and taking care of your mental health. He also recommends going on adventures and seeking therapy to work through existential questions.+
7. Sponsors
Jordan and Jen Harbinger talk about the importance of a good night's sleep and recommend Purple Mattress as a solution. They also discuss the role of consumerism in making up for lost time.+
8. Project Management Tips
Project Management Confidence:Jordan and Gabe discuss a listener's question about how to instill confidence in coworkers while managing a difficult project. They consult with Alisa Cohn, a startup coach and expert in handling difficult conversations at work. Alisa advises the listener to create an informal focus group with colleagues to gain more context on the project and its history. She also suggests asking direct questions to identify what has worked and what hasn't, who the detractors and allies are, and what resources or attitudes need to shift for the project to be feasible.+
Overcoming Project Obstacles:Jordan and Alisa discuss how to tackle a project that has been stuck for a while due to poor management. They provide tips on how to approach colleagues and get the real story behind the project's delay. They also emphasize the importance of relationship building and creating a plan to work around sticking points. The upside to successfully completing the project is the potential for increased capital and opportunities for future projects.+
9. Outro
Personal Training Benefits:Jordan shares his personal experience with online personal training and how it has positively impacted his fitness level and overall health. He highly recommends giving it a try and provides a free trial offer for listeners.+
Networking Habits:Jordan shares his insights on how to build and manage relationships using systems and tiny habits. He emphasizes the importance of building relationships before you need them and provides tips that take just a few minutes per day. Don't miss out on his free Six-Minute Networking course at jordanharbinger.com/course.+