Why Is No One Having Sex? - Alex DatePsych | Modern Wisdom Podcast 593

Desire Decline

The decline in sexual desire within long-term relationships is a complex issue, with women experiencing a sharper decline than men. Chris Williamson highlights that women's sexual desire decreases significantly over time, with a notable drop after 15 years of marriage 1. Alex DatePsych suggests that this could be due to the libido gap and evolutionary factors, such as the potential benefit of genetic diversity from new partners 1. He also notes that women's sexual satisfaction is often lower due to factors like the orgasm gap, which can make sex feel more like a chore 2.

Disgust sensitivity for women is significantly higher. And as soon as you drop through a particular threshold from that, sex goes from I imagine Williamson Costello said sex to men is like pizza. There is good pizza and there's pizza. There is good sex and there is sex. Whereas to women there is such a thing as bad sex.

--- Chris Williamson

Hormonal birth control may also play a role, as it affects women's mate preferences and sexual satisfaction 2.

   

Infidelity

Infidelity is a prevalent issue, with about half of men reportedly cheating at some point in their lives. Alex DatePsych explains that infidelity is not only common but also heritable, suggesting a genetic component to this behavior 3. He notes that people with a family history of infidelity are more likely to cheat themselves, raising questions about the role of genetics versus environment 3.

A lot of the time we think about heritability as if it only applies to physical features, but eye color and something like that heritability applies to behavior.

--- Alex DatePsych

While the saying "once a cheater, always a cheater" holds some truth, not everyone who cheats will do so again. Chris Williamson mentions that a significant number of people cheat only once and never repeat the behavior 4.